high people should be assigned attendants
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
They are going to name an STD after you.
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize
