Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
I just found little boats floating in my bathtub....they are made out of white castle boxes, condoms, pickles, and corks. All the wine we bought is being used as the "ocean"....clearly we didn't drink any of the wine.....but I don't remember doing this.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
Randomize
