Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
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