Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
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