You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
Randomize
