so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
Randomize
