She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Randomize
