He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
come over after work tomorrow, liz and i will make all of your wildest dreams come true. so long as your wildest dreams involve drinking champagne at my house with two girls who won't have sex with you.
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
Trying to figure out these fractions. I bought 5 fifths of gin last week. Does that mean I have one whole gin? 5/5 = 1, right? You're having to homeschool your kids right now--so ask them.
Randomize