i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
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