Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
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