Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
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