smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
I was just at the bank and there was a fat lady wearing a cape. today is gonna be awesome.
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
Randomize
