i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
Randomize
