Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
Randomize
