So drunk its hurt
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
Randomize
