I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
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