ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
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