So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
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