It's just like the Real World with babies
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
there is puke in my bra ... again
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
Randomize
