we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
yeah well we're currently on the phone and she's telling me about how much she misses me and all this shit and i muted myself and i'm watching porn.
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
That was an excessively violent trivia night
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
Randomize
