I've blown a few things in my day
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize
