There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
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