this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
They were out of watermelon smirnoff, so we got you a fifth of 5 o'clock and an actual watermelon.
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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