k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
This gyro tastes like lonliness
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
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