so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
Randomize
