soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Randomize
