I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
When my parents ask, do you think "he was the cop I gave head to in order to get out of a speeding ticket" will suffice as to how we met?
Randomize
