i don't like sucking hair
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
Randomize
