I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
Why do I feel like that's not the first time you've drank champagne with someone dressed as a unicorn?
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Randomize
