Who did Billy Mays play for?
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
do you know what's more awkward than a positive pregnancy in a public bathroom?
not a thing
walking in on a stranger's positive pregnancy test in a public bathroom
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
I need Jameson.
Yea? How do you think I feel? Your job during the delivery is to keep that flask ready. The moment our kid pops out, I'm taking a shot.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize
