Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
Randomize
