either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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