I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
Randomize