It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
The dentist just called my mother to confirm the appointment that I made on his answering machine at 4:33 am this morning..
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Let me know if you need some dick this weekend.
Between the BF being in town, partying at the Side Dick’s house tonight and two Tinder dates tomorrow I’ve got dick to spare!!
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