So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
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