maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
he thought i was a dude.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Randomize
