: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat"
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
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