started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
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