Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
Did I show you my penis last night?
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
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