Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
We were just sitting together and this guy walks up to us and says, "you ladies are drinking too slow", puts a 5 dollar bill on the table and just leaves the bar. Helloooo Taco Bell
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
Randomize