If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
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