no one should ever give us hovercrafts
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
Can vaginas get frostbite?
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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