ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
Randomize
