there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Randomize
