i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
You'd be proud. Took my birth control today at 12:30 with a Budweiser. Guy across the bar saw and held his bottle up to salute me 😂
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