then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
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