Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
Randomize
