Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
Randomize
