brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
my fingers and penis are no longer on speaking terms. My penis is too jealous of where my fingers get to go.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
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