Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
You realize that if you get murdered while we're talking, I'm gonna have to explain to your next of kin why the last thing on your phone is a picture of my boobs.
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
Randomize
